Tuesday, February 3, 2015

My Most Powerful Parenting Lesson Yet May Have Just Come From "I Love Lucy"


I never know what to get my mom for Christmas or birthday or any gift giving holiday. She has everything she needs and when you ask her what she wants you never get a straight answer. The typical sappy "You are gift enough honey" is the usual reply. This last Christmas I became acutely aware that life in our house had been crazy chaos. Yes, even more crazy chaos than usual. As a result I had not been able to spend much quality time with my mom. Considering this I decided to give her play tickets to see "I Love Lucy" on stage. The benefit was two-fold. My mom has always loved "Lucy" and for me I would get some much needed time with mom.
Us making complete fools of ourselves

Our seats were not the best. Honestly we sat in the last possible row of seats but my mom reassured me that she had her contacts in so it was "all good." As we sat laughing and enjoying a great theater production this feeling started to well up inside of me. I was taken back to 35 years ago when my brothers would leave for school in the morning and mom and I would lay on the couch and laugh till our bellies hurt as Lucy would stomp grapes and stuff her face with chocolates. Ricky would yell "Lucy" and I would try to mimic his exotic accent. These are some of the best times of my entire life. We would snuggle and cuddle and in those moments I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt I was loved.

I started thinking about the fact that some of my most meaningful moments consisted of my mom and I laying on a couch watching a thirty minute sitcom. I consider all the things my mom did for me over the years. She volunteered at my school, she sat on the soccer board (which if you knew my mom you would know how hilarious that is), she brought me and my friends places, she took me swimming and shopping. We have many wonderful memories together but some of the best took place on the couch with Lucy.

As I stared out into the dark theater my eyes filled with tears. I constantly feel so much pressure to be the best mom. Not better than another, just the best mom for my kids. I volunteer but then feel guilt when another field trip arises and I am not able to attend. I plan parties and purchase tickets to the next best thing the trouble is there is always the next best thing. I often feel that I am letting them down when I am not able to live up to my own expectations. And then it occurs to me...

Could my most meaningful mom moments be snuggling with Grace watching Love It or List It? Could I be making a bigger impact when I stop with my over-committing and stop and watch The Bachelor with my 17 year old? (no judgement please) Or just maybe even sitting with Ben while he explains to me for zillionth time how Yu Gi Oh is played?

Could I have complicated this whole motherhood thing?

Please Lord in my busyness and attempts to be the "best mom" please don't let me miss it. Do not let me spend another moment comparing Pinterest parties or committing to things that will only result in more frazzled stress. Slow me down, remind me to rest and see what you have placed right smack dab in front of me. 

Thank you Lucy and thank you Mom. I love you.